I find myself falling in love with Micah.
When I was pregnant, there was a refrain from the Eucharist prayer during Advent that struck me. It was something like this: "Mary bore Christ in her womb with a love beyond telling." I found myself questioning whether or not I loved the child that was within me, at least in the same way that Mary apparently loved baby Jesus in utero. I know I loved the idea of Micah. And even though Micah was very much alive within me, and not simply an idea, I didn't know him.
I am now enjoying this great introduction to my son. It began immediately as he was placed on my chest after his arrival into this world. I don't want to discount that our relationship obviously started in the womb, but Micah in the flesh for my eyes to behold, and my arms to embrace, and my ears to hear his coos and tiny whispers, and my nose to smell his newborn-ness, and my lips to kiss his sweet cheeks is a wonderful thing. How much we have to discover about one another!
Micah is why I get up in the morning (sometimes not when I would prefer). Micah is introducing me to a whole new world of reading options; from parenting advice to children's cloth books that are seemingly indestructible. Micah is showing me in new ways what breaks my heart (violence done to the vulnerable in this world) and what amazes me with joy and gratitude (the smiles on my son's little face).
So, yes, I am falling in love and probably will be for the next good while.
Posted April 20, 2007
My brother Aaron first introduced me to this prayer many years ago. He was in college at the time and happened upon it as he visited the Seattle University campus for mass one evening. The priest who was celebrating the mass had selected this prayer for his ordination. Aaron liked the prayer so much that he forwarded it along to me. I remember thinking that this was a very good prayer because of the truth it speaks, and its broad appeal. Turns out, it is a very popular prayer in Jesuit communities-- so I have read this one many times, especially teaching at Bellarmine. I am always moved by the simple words. It was written by Pedro Arrupe, SJ-- the former Superior General of the Society of Jesus.
Nothing is more practical than finding God,
that is, than falling in love
in a quite absolute, final way.
What you are in love with,
what seizes your imagination,
will effect everything.
It will decide
what will get you out of bed in the morning,
what you will do with your evenings,
how you will spend your weekends,
what you read,
who you know,
what breaks your heart,
and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.
Fall in love,
stay in love,
and it will decide everything.
Ciao! You've found my new experiment in technology and writing. My name is Sarah, and I reside in Seattle, Washington with my wonderful husband, Brooke, my adorable beagle, Mia, and the newest love in my life, my son Micah. I am expecting my second child--another little boy named Eli-- in late September/early October. During my pregnancy and early stages of motherhood with Micah, I had found that I was wanting to write reflections on my life as a mother, and more specifically, my life as a mother and a woman of faith. I still find myself wanting to write, and even more so, as Micah grows and develops and another baby is soon to enter my world, but I find that making time is my biggest challenge. But I will press on and write as I can. Hope you find something here interesting.